


Without a Trace

by hereruha



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Prostitution, Drama, Eventual Smut, F/M, M/M, Original Character Death(s), Prostitution, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-23
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-07-26 07:13:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7565038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hereruha/pseuds/hereruha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when you face the one person you thought you'd hate for the rest of your life? Ruki never thought this would be the outcome, but maybe, just maybe, he has the right to a happy ending.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not a native speaker.

“You know, I found him. He’s a musician, I think you’d like his style, after all you always supported him in everything he did, and you always were open-minded…”

The young man wiped away his tears that didn’t cease to flow down his cheeks. He still couldn’t believe it. It had been ten years but the sorrow was still there, deeply grounded in his heart and soul. He faintly smiled at the grave in front of which he was sitting and placed his right hand on it.

“He has a good life, sister. You thought I didn’t notice it as I was only twelve, but I could very well see that you worried about him, even though he had abandoned you. Your feelings for him never changed…”

He stood up, leaving the bunch of flowers he had bought earlier before the grave. He looked up at the sky and noticed the dark clouds. He scrunched up his nose, shaking his head, it would soon start to rain.

“You kept on going during four years, you let us believe you were getting better… You shouldn’t have lied, if you had talked to us maybe things would have happened in another way. For this I will never forgive you, even if I know he has some responsibility in your death,” he murmured, turning his back to the grave. “You should have stayed, just for me, I still need you.”

The young man walked away from the grave, sighing heavily. When would he stop grieving? When would he stop blaming himself? In his eyes they were all at fault, if they had done something, if they had opened their eyes, she would still be there, amongst them, alive and maybe happy, finally.

He left the cemetery and put his headphones over his ears, holding back a sob as a certain song started. He had left without a trace, the same way she had, the same way many had, and maybe he would follow one of them soon.


	2. Chapter One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not a native speaker.

The young platinum-blond man observed the fans in front of him, most of them being shameless teenage girls. They asked things he would never even imagine asking, but he guessed that’s how it was to be a normal teenager, although not everyone could enjoy those years the same way they did.

From what he had understood, it was quite seldom to have such meetings with the band, but those girls didn’t seem to care about it, nor did he, really. He had been lucky to find out about the band and about that specific member, that was all. If it weren’t for Maya he probably would have never even taken an interest in that movement. He had too much things to deal with, he didn’t have time for anything that could be related to such trivial things. This was an exception, the only one he would make until he was out of hell.

He looked ahead as the queue was getting smaller and smaller, he was one of the last people in the line, just a small group of boys was behind him.

Once it was his turn, the young man directly headed to the only person he wanted to meet, nothing showing through his body language. The man probably wouldn’t recognise him anyway, after he was quite still a child when he had left.

The musician looked up at him, as he was sitting on a chair at a table, and smiled, although his dark, obsidian eyes showed how tired he truly was. His dazzling smile could barely hide that.

“I only have one question,” coldly said the platinum blond, playing with his silver rings. “Or more like two words.

The raven-haired man frowned slightly, confused, but nodded his head while the other members looked at the standing man in both perplexity and curiosity.

“Ayumi Matsumoto,” he uttered after a few minutes during which he had just been staring at the singer and guitarist.

He noticed how the other stiffened, dropping the felt-tip marker he had in his right hand. The raven had a vacant look now, as if he had seen a ghost.

The young man gave him a malicious smile, turned on his heels and walked out of the building. So he did remember his sister, but it seemed like he hadn’t thought about her in a while, seeing how he had reacted.

He took a pack of cigarettes out of his tote bag and lit one. He breathed in some of the poisonous smoke, feeling his muscles slowly relaxing. He wasn’t sure of what he felt now that he had seen him again after all these years, he had a slight knot in the stomach. The platinum blond used to have a crush on the raven when he was younger. At the time he was only twelve though, while he was already nineteen, and anyway dated his sister. It was just a silly crush, that was what he always told himself, back then as well as now when he thought about it.

He leant against his bike and looked up at the clear-blue sky. He could very well remember how the raven used to enthral him, how he always fumbled for words, not knowing what to say to the older boy. He was young and impressible, but that time was over, that part of him had died with Ayumi.

He heard some hasty footsteps in his back. He looked over his shoulder and saw the raven-haired man rushing to him, he seemed to have pulled himself together.

“Who are you?” he asked once he had reached the smaller man.

The blond couldn’t keep himself from laughing. Had he really changed that much? Of course he had dyed his hair blond and he now wore make-up, but he actually looked a bit like his sister with that, especially with his natural, feminine features.

“Takanori,” he replied, looking at the raven scornfully.

The musician looked surprised at that answer. He really hadn’t recognised him. The blond couldn’t deny that it was normal, he used to be quite a cheerful boy, and back then he dreamt of being like the older one, but now… His current self clashed with his former self. Maybe if Ayumi had been alive, things would have been different…

“Taka-chan? You’ve ch–”

“ _ **Taka-chan**_ doesn’t exist anymore, it’s Ruki now,” the blond cut him off.

The raven’s eyebrows knitted together. Ruki could perfectly see that he wasn’t aware of anything. If he thought about it thoroughly, maybe he would be able to guess what was going on, but no, he was completely lost.

From the corner of the eye, the blond saw the other members coming.

“Where’s Ayumi?”

Tears clouded the platinum blond’s eyes when he heard the other’s question, never had he thought it would put him in such a state.

He threw his cigarette on the ground, stepping on it, and bawled his fists.

“Why do you care? You abandoned her a long time ago.”

The raven looked down at the other’s accusation, he almost seemed regretful. However it was to late to feel remorse for something that had happened fourteen years ago, it was way too late, and it wouldn’t have changed anything.

“She’s dead.”

His eyes widened in shock, he opened his mouth, trying to say something, but he was at a loss for words.

“Because of you,” continued Ruki.

“What do you mean?” frowned the other.

“After the breakup she fell into depression, she kept going four years, but then...”

The raven folded his arms, having a hard time believing it.

“It’s been ten years, you can’t even imagine what it’s like to find your own sister in a pool of blood when you’re only sixteen.”

The other musicians looked at each other while the platinum blond just smirked, none of them expected such a thing. At least he had managed to get some surprise out of them, it was better than nothing. The worst would have been that the raven knew about it but that he wouldn’t have tried to contact him and his family to at least offer his condolences. After all, him and Ayumi had been together for five years, it would have been the most natural thing to do, if he wasn’t an arsehole of course. But Ruki could see that the raven wasn’t aware of what had happened, so he wouldn’t hold this against him, he would at least try not to.

“I’ve nothing else to say to you, just take care of yourself. At least you succeeded in getting the life you dreamt of,” he said, straddling his bike.

“Wait, Takanori.”

“Takanori doesn’t exist anymore, Yuu, he died with Ayumi,” retorted the blond, putting on his helmet.

He saw the raven nip at his lower lip and he couldn’t stop himself from smiling faintly, that was something he used to like about the other, he always did that when he was hesitant about something, and usually he would always end up doing it.

“Ruki, you came here to meet me, don’t leave just yet,” he ended up saying.

“Why? You’re the one responsible for Ayumi’s death, why should I stay with you?”

“I never imagined such a thing would happen… And I want to know what I’ve become since I left…”

Ruki almost didn’t hear the end of the raven’s sentence, but he still was quite sure of what he had heard. Did he want to make up for lost time? Such a hypocrite, the platinum blond wasn’t the one who had decided to leave, the other was, it had been his decision.

“You reek of pity, I don’t need that, _**Aoi**_ ,” he growled, stressing the other’s nickname.

The raven-haired musician shook his head and took a few steps forward, taking Ruki’s left hand in his. The young man stared at Aoi in shock, were those tears he saw in the other’s eyes?

“Please, come home with me tonight.”

He couldn’t hold back a sob. Unfortunately he still had feelings for that man. He could hate him as much as he wanted, blaming him for his sister’s death… But a part of him still had those ridiculous feelings from a long time ago, from that silly crush. Those full of emotions, dark eyes especially still had an effect on him.

His blue eyes locked with Aoi’s obsidian ones and he ended up agreeing before letting himself fall in the other’s arms, in tears. He would definitely regret it, but maybe he needed this to get over Ayumi’s death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, this took me longer than I thought to finish. It's already written in French, although I had to change stuff because it wasn't exactly the same kind of story, but maybe it's the translating part that is taking more time, who knows.
> 
> I'm sorry it's quite short, and it's going to be so for a few other chapters, but well... I'll try to make them longer! I also don't reveal much yet about Ruki, but it's coming.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!  
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated ♡


	3. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not a native speaker.

His eyes were set upon the platinum-blond-haired, young man sitting on the other side of the coffee table. He didn’t seem at ease, his eyes kept on moving, looking everywhere but at him, and he played with his rings. He had changed, thought Aoi. Never would have he imagined that the little, innocent Takanori would become like this, would change so much. He wasn’t even sure how that was possible, knowing how his parents were.

Dressed the way he was, the blond definitely attracted attention. The raven hadn’t seen any man wearing shorts, garters and fishnet stockings in a long time. Even Uruha didn’t wear such provocative clothes back in the days, and the man had stopped even wearing shorts, he most likely was the last guy Aoi had seen in those before Ruki came back in his life.

He shook his head, mentally slapping himself. He shouldn’t have let his eyes roam over the other’s body, after all he was Ayumi’s brother, and after what he had learnt… They had talked for an hour already, mostly about Ruki’s older sister. The latter hadn’t managed to overcome the breakup, however, not everything had been told to Ruki. Aoi hadn’t abandoned Ayumi, she had been the one not wanting to follow him to Tokyo. Back then, the raven never would have given up on his dreams, even for love.

“Anyway, what are you doing? You must have a job,” he said, trying to change the subject.

Ruki stiffened when he heard the musician’s question, of course he had job. He had driven his motorbike there before joining the raven at his flat. However, he couldn’t possibly talk about it with him, he couldn’t talk about it with anyone outside his little circle.

“Ruki?”

“Hm yes, of course, I’ve a job…”

He was twisting his hands even more, which didn’t go unnoticed to the raven. Aoi narrowed his eyes, suspicious. What could possibly make the blond so uncomfortable? They were only talking about his job, it was no big deal, was it? Ruki forced himself to smile at Aoi, but the raven sighed heavily and tilted his head back.

“You can tell me,” he finally said, smiling softly.

“No, I can’t. You’ll judge me, and we just met again after years, I don’t trust you enough for that,” grumbled the platinum blond.

The raven-haired man looked down, defeated. He could understand how Ruki felt. After fourteen years without seeing each other at all, it was normal, and Ruki was young at the time, they didn’t know each other that well either.

He looked up, sceptical, when he suddenly heard Ruki laughing.

“Actually you already know where I’m working,” he said, still laughing, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes.

“Are you okay?” frowned the raven.

“Perfect,” replied the blond, wiping away the tears.

“How could I know where you work? It’s the first time I see you in years.”

Ruki smiled cryptically and stood up, going to the floor-to-ceiling window.

Aoi stared at him, an eyebrow quirked up, and noticed some marks on the other’s thighs, something he hadn’t paid attention to earlier. He could only see a patch of skin, but even under the fishnet stockings, the raven could figure out some of them. He blinked a few times, shaking his head, but there was no doubt in what those were: hickeys and even bite marks.

That reminded him of an invitation he had received a few months ago from a procurer, which he had accepted out of pure politeness. He hadn’t met any of the people who worked for him, he had just been in the panderer’s office. The man, named Yoshiatsu Moriyama, had tried to convince him to enjoy his visit, but Aoi just couldn’t do such a thing. He had accepted the invitation only because that man had significant influence in the city, even though not much people knew about it. If he wanted, he could ruin a lot of people’s careers, Aoi hadn’t wanted to set him against him.

Ruki noticed how the guitarist seemed to be lost in thoughts, having a vacant look. He faintly smiled, the raven must have understood. The platinum blond walked behind the other and sat on the armrest, circling Aoi’s neck with his arms, leaning down he whispered a few words in the other’s ear, bringing him back to Earth. The raven abruptly turned his head to look at the blond, shocked. Ruki laughed and moved back, a satisfied grin stretching his red-painted, full lips. He liked to tease others, and with someone like Aoi it was even better. The man had no idea what to expect from him, he didn’t know how the blond had grown up, which meant he was surprised by each little gesture or word.

“I think you understood,” Ruki said, sitting back in his place.

“Let’s say that seeing _**this**_ helped,” replied Aoi, pointing at the blond’s thighs.

The blond looked down, spreading his legs, and snorted.

“Oh, this…”

His right eyelid twitched when he realised how the other must have ogled him to notice his hickeys and bite marks. Was he really still a child in the other’s eyes?

He looked up at the raven and couldn’t stop himself from bursting into laughter, the man clearly looked ashamed. He still wasn’t over the fact that Ruki was nothing like the young Takanori he used to know.

The platinum blond crossed his legs and let himself sink in the couch. His few days of vacation were over, he had to go back… He maybe could have tried to escape, but Moriyama’s gentleness had prevented him from doing so. After all, the man had taken Ruki in when he had ran away from home, finding himself alone, without a roof over his head in a city he didn’t know back then, too far from home to even try and go back as he had no money left. Moriyama trusted him enough to let him go away for a few days, it wasn’t something common in that house. Ruki probably was the only one for whom such a favour had been done in years. Well, he was twenty-six years old, he also was the most experienced one, nobody had been there for as long as he had. Maybe that was why Moriyama had let him out… To thank him for his ten years of “good and faithful service” as the procurer would say.

“I think I’ll go,” he ended up saying, standing up.

“Already?” asked Aoi, surprised.

“I’ve to go back, it was my last day of vacation and it’s getting late,” replied the blond, smiling sadly.

Aoi stood as well and approached the blond, spreading his arms. Ruki reluctantly looked at him, but ended up giving in to the hug. He felt guilty for becoming closer with the raven when he still thought about his sister, but he couldn’t stop himself, somehow, it was stronger than him.

He let himself be embraced by Aoi, circling his waist with his thin arms while the raven tightened his grip around Ruki’s lissom body, taking in his scent. He buried his face in the other’s hair. He had a hard time believing he already was twenty-six years old, he had nothing to do with the twelve-year-old, innocent boy he knew…

Ruki shuddered slightly, not liking how he was beginning to feel. He could have stayed this way forever, but he didn’t have a choice, he had to leave, he had to go back “home”, he had to pay off his debts.

He grudgingly pushed away the guitarist, a memory coming back to him. When he was younger, when Aoi was still there with Ayumi, he would always go to the raven when he had a nightmare, feeling safe in his arms. Aoi often slept at their place and he was the one who would always take care of Ruki when he needed to be comforted.

Now that the blond thought about it, it was ridiculous and he sort of understood why his sister was always so mad at him when she woke up in her bed, alone, and found Aoi in Ruki’s. She always scolded Ruki, telling him to grow up, and she told Aoi to let the small boy deal with his problems alone otherwise he wouldn’t learn how to live alone. It was quite paradoxical knowing that she hadn’t managed to stand being alone after Aoi had left for Tokyo.

The platinum blond shook his head and grabbed his handbag, opening the door.

“You can come whenever you want,” suddenly said Aoi.

“It’s impossible, this time was an exception,” replied Ruki, smiling softly.

He slightly waved at the raven as he walked out, heading to the lift. He could feel Aoi’s piercing gaze in his back, but he didn’t want to turn around, he couldn’t. If he did, he wasn’t sure what would happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this! I kinda did, although I wish I could have made it longer, but well, I won't as long as the chapters are the ones I'm translating. Soon though, they'll be longer, I promise.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated ♡

**Author's Note:**

> There it is, the prologue of my new Aoiki. This actually is a fanfic I started in French a year ago, but I decided to write it in English now and change a few things too at the same time.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated ♡


End file.
